Roddenberry comic

roddenberryThe Oatmeal created a comic which you really should check out. It can be found here.

The comic tells the story of a plane crash, in which the 25 year old co-pilot goes back into the burning plane to rescue passengers and lead a group of survivors through the desert to find help.

The co-pilot was named Gene Roddenberry, and after these events he stopped being a pilot and became a writer and eventually created Star Trek.

In these uncertain times when you are stranded in the desert, get out and help someone, it may change the world.

Star Trek is back (in 2017)


As you have probably heard Star Trek is coming back to TV. I recently joined with the Sci Fi Waffle podcast to discuss.

Sci Fi Waffle: Episode 12 – STAR TREK IS BACK!!

In this episode we discuss the great news that Star Trek IS BACK!!.

Shawn and I are joined again by James Roberts and TrekMates News feed Editor Simon Foster to speculate about the announcement of a new Star Trek TV series due to debut in January 2017.

James can be found on our sister podcast The Battle Bridge and Simon can be found on Twitter @funkysi1701

To listen go, to leave feedback go

Top 10 Warp 11 Songs

I don’t want to go to work
Just want to hang with Captain Kirk

I am a big Warp 11 fan. Warp 11 are a Star Trek rock band from Sacramento, California. Their songs often feature bad language, sex and drinking but always feature references to Star Trek characters and episodes and a good dose of humour.

redAlertCover_02I first listened to Warp 11 in about 2004 and have listened to every album they have released since. The second album Red Alert is probably my favourite but all their albums have a few tracks which I love. They have just released their seventh album and to celebrate this I will list my favourite tracks.

All lyrics are by Warp 11 and no infringement is intended, if you like what you see go to their website (, or buy their music. Also Warp 11 if you are reading this, come to the UK, I would love to hear you perform live.

10. It’s Dead Jim

From the fourth album It’s Dead Jim. This song came out after Enterprise was cancelled and is all about the fact there was no more new trek being made. It was a bleak time to be a trekkie and I shared Warp 11’s sadness in this song.

First they took my TOS
Then they took my TNG
Said “bon voyage” to Voyager
Now there’s nothing left for me

Decommissioned DS9
Now there’s no more Enterprise
Erased the animated show
Yeah, she met a quick demise

The final frontier has been finalized
There ain’t no coming back
It’s getting no reprise
It boldly came and went
Got no Trek to represent
I never thought the day
Would come that I had to say
It’s dead Jim

Space is cold and so am I
Just like Kirk my show has died
Everything has gone awry
I guess it’s time to say goodbye

‘Cause Scotty’s gone and so is Bones
They took their final voyage home
And I guess I’ve always known
That some day I’d be alone

Tore down the sets today
Gave the plastic ears away
Sold the props on eBay
Left my life in disarray

It’s dead Jim
Until they bring it back again

9. 7 of Mine

From the second album Red Alert. 7 of 9 is one sexy character so it is no surprise that Warp 11 chose to sing about that in a few songs and I think this is probably the best example.

Flesh and bone and silicone
You’re all by yourself, but you’re never alone
You’re pretty smooth, for a chick full of wires
So cold to the touch
But you set me on fire

Assimilate me
Dominate me
Short circuit my mind
Energize me
Your thighs always rise me
Let’s go out and make your gears grind
Seven of mine

One minute you’re cruel
And then you’re kind
You gave me a virus, but baby I don’t mind
‘Cause I self destruct when I see your behind
I’ll show you the difference between seven and nine


Well, life and love are so absurd
And assimilation is the final word
Resistance is futile can’t you see
So, come on now baby and assimilate me
I’ll give you an identity
Locutus ain’t got nothing on me, oh yeah

Let’s grab a shuttle and go to your cube
You bring the oil and honey I’ll bring the lube
It’s not monogamy
‘Cause in the end
When I’m f****** you, I’m f****** all of your friends


8. Old Country Dr.(The Ballad Of Bones)

From the second album Red Alert. A song dedicated to Bones so of course it is great. The use of harmonica makes you think of the country doctor which is a nice touch. This song gets a sequel as well on one of the later albums.

Well, they call me Bones and I’m third in command
Second in line is a man I just can’t stand
He’s a green blooded, pointy-eared, seven year itch
And when he pon farrs
He’ll try to make me his bitch

Well, I may or may not have divorced my wife
But I damn sure pulled the plug on my daddy’s life
And two months later, well, they found a cure
I’m just an old country doctor on a damned five year tour

The damned teleporter
Yeah, it gives me the creeps
The first time I used it
I couldn’t get it up for weeks
Now my tricorder’s busted
And sick bay just stinks
I guess I’ll just go replicate me a drink


Well, Jim is the captain of this here ship
We call her the Enterprise, and the crew’s pretty hip
Yeah, the girls all wear go-go boots and miniskirts
And I spend my days patching all the red shirts

Well, I have been asked to do many a thing
Outside the area of my expertise
Damn it Jim, I know I’ve told you before
Damn it Jim, I know I’ve told you before
Damn it Jim, damn it Jim, I told you before

I’m just an old country doctor on a damned five year tour
Just an old country doctor on a damned five year tour

7. Space Happy

From the second album Red Alert. This song is just solid good fun, with a catchy chorus that I can’t help singing along to.

Gonna take a five year tour
Boldly go where no man’s gone before
Gonna travel to the end
And make new friends

Move ahead warp factor ten
Put a miniskirt on my yeoman
Represent the human race
And we’ll make space
A happy place

To boldly go where no man’s gone before
I think I sang that line once before
(But I’m not too sure)
We’ll be so happy – can’t you see?
A zero-g community

Gonna travel to new worlds
Beam on down and meet some green girls
Gonna see what we can see
A fancy-free galaxy


Come and take a tour with me
They’ll be no Kahns or Kobiashi
Gonna travel to the end
And make new friends
With aliens


6. And Thats Why I’m In A Star Trek Band

From the second album Red Alert. Not only does the start of this song make me think of the postman pat theme but it is good fun.

I love gettin’ hummers from chicks dressed as Klingons
Bumpy heads bobbin’ up and down
Like their necks have a spring on
And I know their teeth hurt
But I still get my thing on

And that’s why
And that’s why
I’m in a Star Trek band

I wanna tag team a stripper with Mr. William Shatner
He’ll take the front and hell, I’ll take the back-ner
And when we blow
We’re gonna reach warp factor

And that’s why
And that’s why
I’m in a Star Trek band

Well, people ask me
Where do I find my joy?
Do I like hot girls, green aliens or young boys?
Well, I got two words for you my friend – Leonard Nimoy

And that’s why
And that’s why
I’m in a Star Trek band

And that’s why
And that’s why
We’re in a Star Trek band

5. Everything I Do(I Do With William Shatner)

From the second album Red Alert. This was probably the first Warp 11 song I heard and it made me want to listen to the rest. Warp 11 don’t just mention trek, they are actual fans as you can tell from the references that litter their songs.

Everything I do, I do with William Shatner
Loosing all my hair while my belly’s growing fat-ner
And when I drink too much
He holds my hair in his hands
And while I’m blowing chunks
He treats me like the captain

Oh, when we get together we boldly go
Talk about our favorite episodes
I don’t want to go to work
Just want to hang with Captain Kirk
And if I had my way I’d make it so

Everything I do, I do with William Shatner
We drink a couple of brews
Go to the Laundromat-ner
When our clothes are dry
We fold them up together
‘Cause everything I do, I do with William Shatner


Hey, spend more time with him than George Takei
Say full speed ahead and we’re on our way
He is so mysterious
His middle name’s Tiberius
And he’ll make me his cabin boy someday

Hey Bill – Let’s go get a tan
Hey Bill – And a green woman
Hey Bill – We’ll kill some Romulans
Hey Bill – I’m your number one fan

‘Cause everything I do, I do with William Shatner
We go to the rodeo and put on our cowboy hat-ners
When we paint the town
We buy each other dinner
We’re fully functional
Just like Brent Spiner

Everything I do, I do with William Shatner
And don’t you wish that you could do it too

4. What would William Shatner do?

From the fifth album I Don’t Want to Go to Heaven as Long as They Have Vulcans in Hell. Everyone’s been in situations where they would like to keep there fandom a secret. And what would William Shatner do?

I’ve got a girl, the coolest girl in the world
But she ain’t fly for the guys in sci-fi
And I’m a guy with a model Enterprise
Imagine her surprise if she ever finds out

I’ve got a queen, but she only wears blue jeans
And I am a guy in Kirk t-shirt
Black boots and a red miniskirt
I’ll be in world of hurt if she ever finds out

I’ve got to think about it
I’ve got to work it through
If she learns my dark secret
What would William Shatner do?

dont_cover_250I’ve got a chick, in bed a lunatic
Won’t be my whore if she knows I love Star Wars
And I know only one thing for sure
I’ll never score If she ever finds out

I’ve got to make a choice now
Deceive her or tell her true
I know Vulcans never lie but
What would William Shatner do?

I love War of the Worlds, got a b**** for green girls
Alien nations, deep space stations
I love flying saucers, say “live long and prosper”
“May the force be with you”, Mr. Sulu

I want to be your man, “by your command”
Don’t want us to be undone, “danger Will Robinson!”
And if I decree “beedee beedee bee”
Does that mean we’ll be through?
What would William Shatner do?

3. Trekie Girl

From the second album Red Alert. When I first listened to this song I was a single young man, so of course I dreamed about finding my own Trekie Girl. My wife now shares my love of Trek and looks extremely hot in a starfleet uniform.

She knows every episode
She wears the boots that go-go-go
She’s got a red miniskirt
She makes me play Captain Kirk

Trekkie girl, Trekkie girl
We go to conventions
She gives me erections
Girl – my Trekkie girl
She paints her skin green
And it’s not Halloween
She rocks my brave new world

She always acts so logical
She drives a Volvo Iike it’s our space shuttle (of love)
She looks just like Britney Spears
Just add a few pounds and some pointy ears

Trekkie girl, Trekkie girl
She loves outer space
Has a black and white face
Oh, girl – my Trekkie girl
I’m her Leonard Nimoy
She’s the real McCoy
She’s got a Spock haircut with curls

And on some nights she tells me
Put my symbiote inside her
She separates my saucer
Yeah, she knows just what to say
And on nights when I loose power
Well it doesn’t even phaser
She grabs my captain’s log
Torpedoes away

She knows every episode
She wears the boots that go-go-go
She’s got a red miniskirt
She makes me play Captain Kirk

Trekkie girl, Trekkie girl
We go to conventions
She gives me erections
Girl – my Trekkie girl
She paints her skin green
And it’s not Halloween

Oh, girl – my Trekkie girl
She loves outer space
Has a black and white face
Oh, girl – my Trekkie girl
I’m her Leonard Nimoy
She’s the real McCoy
My girl – Trekkie girl

2. A Song for People Who Never Watch Star Trek

From the third album Boldly go down on me. This really tells you all you need to know about original series trek, plus I like singing the first line of this song to my son (also called James)

There was this guy
His name was Jim
You can call him Kirk
Or the Captain
He had a tan
And lots of women
Every episode
He got to blow his l***

He worked with Spock
He was a rock
No emotion
Nothing could rattle him
His blood was green
And Pon Farr could make him scream
And lose control
Though that’s illogical

Each week they’d all warp through space
Fight an alien race
And the Vulcan would pinch a neck

If you want to learn more
Go to the video store
Or just listen to this
Song for people who never watch Star Trek

Then there was Bones
Dr. McCoy
Worked with Nurse Chapel
And removed the red shirt shrapnel

Chased the miniskirts
Screaming, “Dammit, Kirk!”
Wait that wasn’t him
He was screaming, “Dammit Jim!”

Each week on the Enterprise
All the red shirts would die
But no one noticed or got upset

And the next generation
Will watch in syndication
Or just listen to this
Song for people who never watch Star Trek

And for three seasons
You know what they’d do
They’d boldly go
With the rest of their crew

Like Scotty
He was a Scot
And Chekov
He screamed a lot
And Uhura
And Sulu
But let’s face it
After Kirk, Spock and McCoy
Who gives a f*** about the rest of the crew?

1. The Saddest Song Ever Written About Star Trek

From the fourth album It’s Dead Jim. This song really encapsulates the sadness of Star Trek’s cancellation and the passing away of some of Star Treks greats.

It was a warm summer’s night when I sat down to write
The prettiest song ever written about Star Trek

The sky was clear
Full of stars above
I thought of Kirk and his crew
And their mission of love
And I sang the first verse
Of the prettiest song ever written about Star Trek

When the words came out
Everything was wrong
For those who’d boldly go
Had already gone
‘Cause the show was cancelled
And the dream was dead
And a red alert started wailing in my head
And I realized I had written
The saddest song ever written
About Star Trek

brighter_cover_250Now the sky was dark
Devoid of love
And Roddenberry’s ashes were floating up above
Raining down on a man
Singing the saddest song ever written about Star Trek

And now Bones is nothing but bones
He finally went and took his final voyage home
And Scotty’s body just couldn’t take much more
And I’m sure this is the saddest
Song ever written about Star Trek

I thought about space
And the final frontier
And I shed a tear as I finished
The saddest song ever written about Star Trek

The Hunted, TNG S3 E11, The Battle Bridge

My latest podcast can be found and feedback can be left on the trekmate forums

While the Enterprise-D is reviewing a seemingly idyllic planet’s application for Federation membership, an escaped prisoner leads its crew to discover an ugly secret: the government’s shameful treatment of its war veterans.

Today James and Lou discuss (The Hunted) and what we think of it and much more as well as listener feedback with tonight’s guest host Simon.

Credit: Main Title Theme (TV Edit) was arranged by Dennis McCarthy and composed by Gerry Goldsmith and Alexander Courage

You can download the MP3 version of this show by clicking here.

Upper Pylon 2 – 1 x 09: The Passenger

I recorded another podcast the other week it can be found and feedback about it can be left on the trekmate forums


This week on Upper Pylon 2, we are joined by our first UK guest, Simon (aka funkysi1701) as we take a look at the Bashir-centric “mystery” episode, “The Passenger.”

When a former prisioner, Rao Vantika (a name you’ll hear COUNTLESS times throughout the episode) is killed, his pursuer believes that the late murderer is not really dead, and continues her investigation at DS9 while an important shipment is scheduled to arrive. Will Vantika reappear, and if so, who will he appear as? Well, if you’ve seen the opening of the episode, it really isn’t all that hard to deduce. But join the UP2 crew as we dissect this little caper.

As always, be sure to leave us your feedback about the episode!

Top 25 Star Trek Characters

I am  going to take a break this week from talking about technology to talk about Star Trek.

I have just listened to a podcast where they consider this list of great Star Trek Characters. I am now going to try and come up with my own top 25 characters. Here we go.

Spock,_22931) Spock. My number one star trek character is Spock. Leonard Nimoy who recently passed away brilliantly brought this character to life. We have the inner turmoil that many of us can associate with, we have a journey to become more human, we have the pursuit of logic. We have the great interplay between him and McCoy and Kirk.

2) Data. My second number one star trek character, well OK, second star trek character is Data. His weekly exploration of what it meant to be human is star trek’s best exploration of the human condition. There are so many moments which make me like Data but I think when I builds his daughter, Lal is possibly my favourite.

3) Picard. The Captain of the Enterprise. You want to know about leadership or diplomacy you watch Captain Picard in action. If only more of our world leaders could be like Captain Picard we would have all our Earthly problems sorted by tea-time.

4) Kirk. The original captain of the Enterprise, not so much a Diplomat but could talk a computer to death in minutes. A fun guy to be around as long as you didn’t work in security or want a long lasting relationship with him, (sorry ladies this guy is married to the Enterprise)

5) Worf. Our favourite Klingon. The most honourable man on this list and could handle himself in a battle. Also popular with the ladies if Troi and Dax have anything to say about it.

6) Sisko. Our third captain, but Sisko had much more on his plate than the others. He had a Son to bring up, he lost his wife, he was in the middle of the biggest war the Federation has ever seen (at least on screen anyway), he became a religous icon and later a God.

top-25-star-trek-characters-200905070445018657) 7 of 9. The sexy borg from Voyager what’s not to like? Also brought some much needed conflict to the Voyager crew.

8) Garak. The plain and simple tailor from DS9. But is he also a spy? There are so many layers to Garak you have no idea what to believe.

9) McCoy. Bones to his friends. A great Doctor but even greater friend to Jim Kirk and Spock (not that either of them would admit it.

10) EMH. Please state the nature of the medical emergency, started the show off as just another piece of technology and ended up one of the crews most important characters.

11) Janeway Coffee Addict and defeated the Borg our first female captain.

top-25-star-trek-characters-2009050704442941412) Dukat. DS9s regular bad guy. Started off Bad, then softened to be a good guy for a bit and then signed an alliance that started a war, in the middle of that he went crazy and ended up going to the Bajoran Hell

13) Weyoun. The leader of the dominion from the Gamma Quadrant. Was a clone so he could be killed off a few times and still come back. Had some great interplay with Dukat and later Damar.

14) Damar. Started life as Dukat’s lieutenant and rose in rank to leader of his people, before switching sides to lead a rebellion.

15) Scotty. You cannae change the laws of Physics. An engineer that weekly performed miracles, more often because or large repair estimates.

16) Barclay. The only Starfleet office that was unsure of himself and couldn’t talk to people (Oh a bit like me then)

top-25-star-trek-characters-2009050704450595817) Riker The Captain Kirk of Picard’s crew, could inspire his crew and was popular with the ladies, but looks better with a beard.

18) O’Brien. The everyman of DS9. He constantly had a station that was falling apart but he managed to keep it going, a bit like how I feel sometimes.

19) Quark/Rom/Nog. These three Ferengi made the Ferengi good again. Nog started off as comic relief and ended up a Starfleet officer after turning his back on the acquisition of profit. Rom like his son turned his back on profit to fix things, and Quark was the businessman always had his eye for profit.

20) Odo. The shape shifting outsider that maintained order. Was truly an outsider with no idea where he had come from, but eventually he came to tolerate and even love us Solids.

21) Martok Klingon with one eye that welcomed Worf into his house after his second dis-commendation.

22) Zefram Cochrane Without this guy there would be no Star Trek. Invented the warp drive and enjoying to drink.

23) Uhura Just a communications officer, but in reality was so much more. One of the first black women on television and inspired a generation to better themselves, was the other half of the first inter-racial kiss

24) Mirror Universe Hoshi. Our universe Hoshi Sato was timid and scared of warp drive, the mirror universe version ended up empress of an entire Empire.

25) Kai Winn Power currupts and Absolute power corrupts absolutely and Kai Winn is a prime example of this, so blinded by power she couldn’t hear what her precious Gods were telling her and ended up sleeping with he arch enemy.

Please disagree with me, or listen to the podcast where some of these characters are discussed.